Nivvy's Story Buffet

  I’ve spent the last few weeks practicing how to mourn you for the rest of my life,  I already know my heart will forever miss the weight of yours, My lips will forever miss the graze of your, And I will forever miss what we never got to be, The possibilities are endless, But I lay without a muse, No ending at hand, My pages are tattered, You are gone, I’ve taken up a life of liberation, I sought for risks, Because I have nothing else worth my fury, my rage, my joys, I’ve lost all i possibly could, Within you, I lost myself, So if you ever have to battle through the pearly gates, Call for me, I’ll die to defend the soul standing before the mother of this ache, You my love, Would only find hindrance due to our entwinement, And I wouldn't mind hell with you

I painted a picture, Of us before we died, A masterpiece that I tore to shreds once completed, I need not a reminder of the beauty that was stripped from me, I tore my painting to shreds and realised the canvas was bare, It always had been, I just saw the white as fluffy clouds shaping my future, I just saw the white as the purity and innocence I once had, I just saw the white as perfection   Now I see the flashing lights sent to blind me, Now I see the white cells of my blood trying to shield my wounds as they seep out my bloodied heart, Now I see the cold, desolate snow you left me in Now I see that my masterpiece was only ever special because of the love I had for you, The love that made you unique, The love you breed, The love you thrived from, I put you on some pedestal,  But you were simply average, And we were simply nothing, Actually no,  We had something, But I had loved too much, I had painted masterfully, a tale of tragedy, I had flown too close to the sun, And...

Bounded by war, I stay stagnant, I stay prisoner to the dark edges of my mind, Withered poppies, painted a red that bleeds, My heart now ice, Void of joy, brimming with agony, My tempest of torment, I am woven shut, I have been killed, But groped of the joy of not feeling,