I tried to stop caring,
And perhaps it doesn't hold dictatorship over my life anymore but the blemishes on my heart hurt,
Alot,
I despise how my mind looks at you and crafts vast tales,
How my eyes shape this portrait of you,
With my dream plastered across,
My name written in exact alignment to the blotchy liquid fuelling my heart,
I hate this growing feeling of rage, of envy,
Its like my entire world was bestowed with a layer of nostalgia,
I have no loathe towards you,
You do,
But am I that undesirable?
Why are sides so easy to decide between us,
I'm so malleable,
I'm so bloody docile,
Watch my head meet your feet,
Its evident i’ll never live like you,
So i'll drink the poison until I think i’ve reached by breaching point,
And then failure will be something I savour,
Because at least I tried,
At Least it's not just me
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