Nivvy's Story Buffet

To tell friend from foe is like distinguishing water from wine, So obvious yet we are so blinded by the fogged glass shielding us from the inner liquids, The inner liquids that make the chalice different,  The liquids that hold more than just taste,  But pain and jealousy, Fury and rage, Innocence and corruption, Disgust and hatred Please pick me,  Please save me, from the world of sand dunes sinking to the ground, The love from the bubbles are temporary,  I will aid you through sorrowful seas, I will bless you will loving pleas, i’ll sing to you a lullaby... till my inner fluids run dry Don't come back when you are drunk and desolate, I do not wish to see what I have failed to compete with, It seems we have to race to the end of the line but it forms to a circle that meets no end, Who am I if not competition? Who am I if I don't win?  I’ll drain oceans if it means you want the shells or pearls, I’ll plug the clouds if it means you want to see the sun, I’ll pull...

I speak candidly when I say Wendy Darling is my hero. Perhaps the contorted faces that line in front of me as I speak of my devotion are valid, but nonetheless, I say it with the utmost confidence. Believing was something I could do best: assuming I was great and everything in the entire world would and could be conquered, fall into the palms of my hand. Believing in these happy thoughts, alongside five siblings of which I govern, just as Wendy.  I’ve lived in dozens of worlds; my life a mere choice of which I decided. Within books, I sought solace, confiding in my chosen family. No friends were as loyal as these two cherished companions.  I did not desire a mediocre life; I wanted to drown in my yearning, my hope, my dream.  Yet, even amid these blissful musings, flight is impossible without a sprinkle of fairy dust. I wish I braced a warning of some sort: that one day, I’d've experienced the last dream of my soul. People perceive what they desire, and when my very own ...

  I AM A MUSE It's incredibly devastating,  Yet exceptionally beautiful, Knowing that my words will not be completely understood by anyone,  Knowing that everything I say will be perceived differently,  To some their gold, to others rust  Because we only understand each other,  To the extent in which we understand ourselves,  A rarity in today's day and age,  Who is it that decides to sacrifice bliss for truth,  People now seem to enjoy living in delusion,  People now seem to love ignorance, and cherish it,  But I ask everyone who let ignorance prevail,  Who taught us it was a blessing, it is a curse subjected onto you by those with power, So you stay blinded,  Do you truly wish to walk through the world with fog in your eyes?  Its arguably impossible for 2 souls, two minds, two me’s to reach the same level of understanding,  But whenever a star decided to shine during an eclipse, they do,  And it's absolute...

Im Hopelessly hung on before, a wretched ghost of past, The past, I measle past my present, Revisiting, Re , But these people, their future so paramount, I shall never find myself woven within their dreams, For I am the haunting past they flee from, Or perhaps, I'm the present they didn't want fate to lead to Bitter stained cheeks, Luna you scar, My heart its reeking of loneliness, I'm the pariah, the one they disdain, Your laughter was once mine, You hate me, Why? Was the closet too bleak, suffocating with despair?  Is the present more sheer, a veil hiding the scars I bear,  Since when does an exemplary future disregard the past that holds you,  Perhaps it broke you… but I didn't,  Yet here I stand, shattered and true. I deserve acknowledgement, A word, A glance, Together

How am I redundant, I am the procreator, I am the raiser, Some have the nerve to say I hold a stronger connection to the child for we were once binded as one, I am the producer, And therefore forced to do nothing else, No, not because of concern or worry that perhaps our innards would explode from the fumes of life, No, its because woman cant handle the blatant truth, They say that we do not understand because real life is hard, We don't know what we’re going into. They tell us we don't know better and therefore are imprisoned in the cage, we must grow to love, But is that really the point? Let me fall, Let those years of fury be the most relishing of my life, Isn't the point of this choice? Freedom is revoked because of the fear of subjugation. They shame us due to our innocence and ignorance, Yet never let us be free, What do you want from a woman?

  I’ve spent the last few weeks practicing how to mourn you for the rest of my life,  I already know my heart will forever miss the weight of yours, My lips will forever miss the graze of your, And I will forever miss what we never got to be, The possibilities are endless, But I lay without a muse, No ending at hand, My pages are tattered, You are gone, I’ve taken up a life of liberation, I sought for risks, Because I have nothing else worth my fury, my rage, my joys, I’ve lost all i possibly could, Within you, I lost myself, So if you ever have to battle through the pearly gates, Call for me, I’ll die to defend the soul standing before the mother of this ache, You my love, Would only find hindrance due to our entwinement, And I wouldn't mind hell with you

I painted a picture, Of us before we died, A masterpiece that I tore to shreds once completed, I need not a reminder of the beauty that was stripped from me, I tore my painting to shreds and realised the canvas was bare, It always had been, I just saw the white as fluffy clouds shaping my future, I just saw the white as the purity and innocence I once had, I just saw the white as perfection   Now I see the flashing lights sent to blind me, Now I see the white cells of my blood trying to shield my wounds as they seep out my bloodied heart, Now I see the cold, desolate snow you left me in Now I see that my masterpiece was only ever special because of the love I had for you, The love that made you unique, The love you breed, The love you thrived from, I put you on some pedestal,  But you were simply average, And we were simply nothing, Actually no,  We had something, But I had loved too much, I had painted masterfully, a tale of tragedy, I had flown too close to the sun, And...